An Open Letter to… My Chapstick(s).

As my alarm goes off, I struggle to find my phone on the night table. I reach with my eyes closed and manage to press “snooze”. Next, I gently search for you . . . my chapstick.
With the lights off and my brain still recovering from a deep sleep I find you. You’re there, standing straight up and ready to start your day.
Good morning chapstick.
You make getting up easier, my lips are now soft, unlike when I woke up; all dry and sad.
I lift you up and I carry you to my bathroom. You stand tall there like a warrior, ready to start your day with me. I lift you up at least 6 times while I get ready for the day; your presence brings a smile to my heart.

Time to go downstairs. Do not worry my precious lip warrior. I will not forget you. Into my pocket you go. As I get the kids ready, my lunch packed and my coffee brewed, I turn to you in these stressful times. At least ten more times you soothe me in my morning of hurry.

Everyone is ready, it is time to go to work. I put you back in my pocket and another one of your kind in my purse – to be reunited with your chapstick friend that lives in my car.
Off we go to take on the day. Thank you chapstick(s), for the pleasant ride to work. A ride where I don’t have to worry about dry lips. You are my companion.

We get to work. I’m sorry we have to leave your friend in the car; don’t worry. He will be safe … and don’t forget, there is another of your kind in the classroom, in my desk drawer. You will see each other soon.

Throughout the day, I pick you up and you never disappoint. Sometimes gloss comes before, and sometimes after, but you, my precious warrior, will never be forgotten.

Finally the bell rings, and I know I need to make sure you will not be left behind. It’s okay, you will see your drawer chapstick friend tomorrow. Say ” see you soon “, not
“goodbye”; for tomorrow we will all be together again.

The rest of the night is lovely. I get to hold you in my pocket wherever I may go. Don’t worry, I will always choose the pyjama pants that have a pocket so you never stray far from me. Thank you for wetting my whistle after a nice dinner or a glass of wine. Thank you for soothing me when the kids are cranky. It’s you and me, my precious warrior.

As night falls and I am ready to get into bed. I look at you. I put you on. Then, I take a long sip of water from my nightstand. OH NO! The water has washed some of you away. Don’t worry, I re-apply. Then, I softly set you down to stand tall like a warrior for the night.

Goodnight my dear friend. You did well today; and of course, I will see you tomorrow.

Ten “Quirks” I Carry Daily.

  1. If the laundry is done drying it NEEDS to be folded right then and there.
  2. My fridge has to be cleaned every Sunday… (at least).
  3. Hair before makeup. Always.
  4. Dishwasher unloaded as follows: (NO EXCEPTIONS)
    – cutlery
    -wine glasses / beer glasses
    – regular cups
    – coffee cups
    -sippy cups
  5. Before I leave for a trip, the house needs a deep clean.
  6. The dishwasher filter needs to be cleaned / rinsed before every use.
  7. A chapstick must be carried with me at all times – including a trip to the bathroom.
  8. There. Is . A. Bucket. Or. Basket. For. Anything. And. Everything.
  9. If I haven’t had at least 3 cups of coffee, I’m not a human being.
  10. The simplest decision (such as which drawer should the scissors go in) – takes at least a couple of hours.

Don’t tell me to CALM DOWN. A Sarcastic Reply.

Anxiety has always been a part of who I am. Although for the last eight years it has really creeped in hard. It’s so hard to explain to others what I am feeling and WHY I am feeling it. To be completely honest I actually get anxiety thinking about explaining it to people. So instead here are the four statements/questions I get most & what I’m usually thinking when I hear them.

“Don’t worry about it”. 
Ohhhhhhhhh really? Don’t worry about it?  If only I thought of that. I’m obviously worrying about it because I just FEEL like it. Thinking about things that may or may not happen is suuuuuuuuuper fun for me.

“Take a deep breath”.
This one is two-fold. Yes – deep breathing helps me but you telling me to just stop and take a deep breath isn’t really productive. I actually have to go to a dark, quiet and calming space before the deep breathing will actually work – so just don’t tell me how to breath k?

“Have you taken your meds?”
First of all – thanks for reminding me that I’m medicated as if I didn’t know. Second of all – yes I’ve taken them. Every morning for the last 8 years – thanks so much!

“Calm Down”

Wait, what? This is an option? If only I knew that 8 years ago…I would have never allowed myself to get worked up about anything in the first place.  Switch flipped, I’m okay now – absolutely nothing to worry about.